Sex during pregnancy – all your questions answered

Can we still have sex when I’m pregnant?

“Yes it is definitely safe for most couples to continue with sex during pregnancy,” explains Dr Claudine Domoney of the UK Royal College of Gynaecologists. Some women may even feel more responsive during pregnancy itself. “This is probably due to the high levels of sex steroid hormones and oxytocin released during pregnancy which may increase the level of orgasmic response,” says Domoney.

Is it normal for your sex drive to change when expecting a baby?

 it’s not solely unique for the expectant woman to experience a change in their feelings about sex during pregnancy - men can find pregnancy a greater turn on, while others can lose interest in sex – possibly out of concern for the baby. “There are many changes taking place during pregnancy which can affect sex including blood flow changes can lead to increased flow to genitals which can heighten sensations,” says Sally Randle. “Also the breasts are more sensitive to touch so again some may like this and others not want them touched.”

Are there sex positions that are safer or more comfortable during pregnancy?

As the belly gets bigger, women tend to prefer being on top or in standing positions where they can bend over and support their upper body with their arms,” says Yvonne K Fulbright, co-author of 'Your Orgasmic Pregnancy: Little Sex Secrets Every Hot Mama Should Know.' “As the weight gets heavier, side-by-side is ideal. But in general couples should avoid any positions that put pressure on the belly.”

How long after the birth of a baby should a woman wait before having sex again?

“Generally we would encourage women to wait until six weeks after birth to have sex because of the very tiny risk of air embolism,” says Dr Domoney. “For many women they would not feel comfortable to start before this.” If you have had a caesarean there will be issues of pain and difficulty moving around easily. “If the mother has perineal stitches she will want to wait for these to heal,” says Sally Randle. “Also psychologically women will have different times as to when they will want sex again due to issues of self-image, tiredness and just being overwhelmed by motherhood.”

How soon after the birth of a baby is a woman likely to conceive again - is it true you can’t conceive if you’re breastfeeding?

“We encourage starting contraception from three weeks postnatal - as it is possible to conceive from that time, although unlikely if fully breastfeeding,” says Dr Domoney. When you have your follow-up visit to your doctor soon after the birth you may want to discuss birth control methods. Although for some women breastfeeding can delay the return to ovulation and so prevent them having periods that isn’t the case for all. It’s possible for new mums to be ovulating within four weeks of having their baby – so that postnatal chat the GP or health visitor shouldn’t be avoided.

Can we cope without sex?

Plenty of couples come through the pregnancy and birth without having the regularity or quantity of sex they were having when they were trying to conceive. For both partners the desire for sex can wane but that’s not to say expectant couples can’t continue to be intimate and enjoy a sex life without having full intercourse. “Cuddles, baths together and massages can all help you maintain that closeness and affection, as well as instigating the release of ‘feel-good’ hormones,” says Zita West.